Well, okay, you might.
The contest, which sought an Upworthy-esque headline — but about Arabic literature — was judged by satiric writer and architect Karl Sharro (@karlremarks), novelist Noura Noman, (@NouraNoman), writer-journalist Olivia Snaije (@oliviasnaije), social-media specialist Fatemeh Fakhraie (@fatemehf), and comedian Jacquetta Szathmari (@jacquetta).
The co-winners are UK-based Carole Richmond, with:
Poets are good with words in confined spaces so Al-Ajami thanks the Emir of Qatar for his generosity on granting him 15 years solitary confinement and is looking forward to producing his best work.
And Jordan-based Thorayya al-Rayyes*, with:
This Sci-Fi Bestseller Was Banned In Saudi Arabia. The Reason Why Will Change How You Promote Virtue & Prevent Vice Forever.
Andrew Leber, for his:
This director tried to bring Emile Habibi’s “Saeed the Pessoptomist” to the big screen. What follows is a bittersweet tragicomedy of factual fiction, of heroic cowardice and cruel kindness. Listen closely for the deafening silence at 2:35.
Matthew Lundin, for:
This divorcé found out his city was shaped like a sultan’s seal. What the shape of your town says about the hidden mysteries of the universe may surprise you!
And to Zora O’Neill, for:
Someone told Abu Nuwas the only good poetry took place in the desert. His response will have you cheering from your barstool.
*Thorayya is, yes, a friend of mine. However, I was not involved in the judging process. Still, if you want to get your lawyer(s) involved….